seasons may change,
boys may come and go,
but us, my love, we'll always stay together.
Ok.
This is really simple and I don't know why it has to be so complicated again.
You don't love me.
You don't care for me anymore.
And it has been a looong time now.
So could I please finally stop caring about you??
Why do I want you to know that I am back?
I know you don't care about me, so why do I still want you to do so?
I want to stop caring about you, too.
This is not your year, this new year is for me, so please stop bothering me.
Why can't I just finally stop caring about you?
die leute, die mir helfen wollen, koennen mir nicht helfen.
die leute, die mir helfen koennen, wollen mir nicht helfen.
You are his sunshine
his only sunshine
you make him happy
when skies are grey
and if you knew dear
how much he loves you
please don't take
his sunshine
away
This song had been stuck in my head since I watched the play "the diviners" in my school last thursday.
it was amazing.
i want to be able to act like this too.
I really was affected.. I cried the whole time x)
well.
I fell pretty happy right now.
Thanks to my new book I remembered what I really want to do.
Because all I really want to do right now is making a person I love happy.
I sit in front of your window
again
and fight the urge to knock
and to plead for you to let me in.
I watch you sleep
sleep like a baby
the sweetest thing I've ever seen
and I want to lie down next to you
again.
And if I could
I would tiptoe to your room
open the door
and watch you sleep again.
And then I would sit on the edge of your bed
and brush your hair out of your face
and then I would lie down
next to you
and listen to you breathing
and then I'd snuggle up to you
and listen to your heart beating
but it doesn't beat for me anymore.
I wish it would.
I wish it would.
And now I'll have to wake up
and pull myself out of that dream
because I can never see you again
because you will never see me again
that way...
have you ever loved me?
you said it to me. and i believed you. i never doubted it, even when you broke up with me.
i know you wanted me.
but if your feelings could fade away that fast,
have you ever really loved me?
I want to write to him. anything. I want to know if he's well and what he's doing and thinking. though he hardly would tell me, even if he answered.
i don't know why i want to let him hurt me again.
i know he would hurt me again, just like everytime before.
i don't want him to hurt me.
i just want him.. to love me.
i know it's not possible.
i know he's not able to feel these feelings for me anymore.
but i am.
acting really has become one of my favorite things in the world now, i think.
i love it.
today we did impro-theater and i LOVE it. i really do.
the only german boy in my drama class asked me to do the impro-acting with him and we did a good job i think.
he had to play a cowboy and i was a woman in need who tried to make a fire. in the desert.
it was funny. our teacher gave us directions while we played and then he said "fear" and i moved away from dan, the german boy, and then he said "flirtatious" and i moved all the way back and shuffeld close to him and then he put his arm around my shoulder.. why does this boy have to look so good? why does he have to have such beautiful blue eyes xD
after the exercise our teacher told us about actors who fall in love with the people they have to play with and that this should not happen and bababa.. and i just thought "wow. i failed."
but i'm not in love with dan.
and i should hope i will not be so in the future.. i guess that would be.. bad.
kind of the same as with manu. that would be even worse, maybe..
well.
whatever.
i'm so looking forward to my acting class tomorrow <3
barack obama.
If I was allowed to vote, this would be my choice.
I just wanted this to be said. feels good to finally say this today.
